cancry | (no subject)

[ Content Warnings for parental abuse and light body horror ]

[ It had started out as just a persistent headache.

Beast - now Achilles - had gone through this enough times now to have an idea of what was happening. This sort of headache only came when a memory was also onset, and after the last one being as a big a blow to his identity as it was he decided it was better to just stay home at the Executor house and wait for it to happen. He was trying to avoid Avaritia anyway what with Greta knowing his face, so he would just have to find something to do on this side.

The one thing he didn't notice was all the feathers he was molting everywhere.

He had spent the morning looking through his book of Greek monsters again but come afternoon the headache was at its worst. It felt like his head was about to split apart and he could no longer concentrate on reading. It was when he had gotten up to put the book away though that--

He had been asleep for so, so long now. There was no more village to protect, no more companions to love... he had forced himself into isolation, only waking up and moving every so often to make it harder for anyone that might be looking for him to find him. All he wanted was to be left alone, to sleep in peace.

And yet now there are two figures in front of him, rousing him from his slumber. Queen Rotha of Cygnia herself and her 6 year old child, Odile. She seems to think he's the Beast of Demise from their old prophecy, the one said to end the royal line, and is trying to make some sort of appeal to him. But soon the appeal grows dark, as the queen throws her own child before him, telling him to end the royal line now and leave the rest of Cygnia alone.

...Ah. So that's what this is.

Sacrifice.

What follows isn't pretty. A terrified child crying and begging their own mother for an explanation, resulting in a cold hearted woman who could barely be called a mother unleashing six years worth of hatred and bile at the life she brought into the world. And for what? Because his wings wouldn't grow? Because he wasn't the heir she had wanted and was somehow a failure before ever even being allowed to wear the crown?

"I wish you had never been born--!!"

Those words are the last straw for him. In one swift movement he crushes the queen to death with one enormous, furry, black paw, all life snuffed out of her in an instant.

Wait... a paw?

The rest of it is a bit of a blur. He remembers transforming back into the humanoid form he hadn't used in over a century, hoping to not scare the child any more than he already has. He remembers trying to figure out what to do now, how to make sure the newly orphaned Odile would be safe and not thrown into government turmoil, how to even bring him back home safely without being skewered by every soldier on sight. It's while he was deep in thought that the previously too scared to speak Odile finally says something.

"Um.... M-Mister...?"

"Yes?"

"Your... Your horns..."

"Ah, do they frighten you? I can give myself some wings like yours if that would help-- see?"

--the part of his wing below where he had been injured in the Underside suddenly falls off, landing on the floor with a light thud.

He covers his mouth with one hand as more feathers fall off in big, uneven clumps. But they don't hurt, and unlike before when he was injured there's no pneuma. It's like a prop, a part of a costume, just falling apart after wear and tear. But he had already suspected that's what they were, hadn't he? He had suspected for a while now--

No what hurts... is his head, somehow even more than before. The moment it dawns on him why that is, he's bolting out of the house to find a place to be out of sight, passing anyone who might also be home and leaving a trail of feathers behind him as he does. ]

[OOC: I'd like to try and limit the threads of people chasing after Beast/Achilles to two or three, please! There will be another top level on this post after he's found for everyone else to tag if they want to react to this change, thank you! Limit reached! Here's the top level open to everyone! No content warnings for this part unless otherwise stated in a subject line. ]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ Thankfully he didn't get far. Achilles' running was more akin to that of an injured animal looking for respite than anything else and so the trail eventually leads off into an alley way, one of the many winding paths in Limbo.

His other wing, bone half exposed from all the feathers have already fallen from it lays close to the alley entrance. Huddled up against the wall near the back is a figure that could only be Achilles, his arms over his head and his whole body trembling.

...Did Achilles always have a tail though? Pretty sure he did not. Well there's one here now, one that almost looks like the end of a black snake.

He doesn't seem to have noticed her yet, or be aware that he was even being followed. ]

[ it's a horrific scene to come upon, but not because of Achilles' changes. the discarded wing that Mona steps over carefully, the sight of him curled up like a frightened child; it runs up against the image Achilles with a dissonance that shakes something in Mona's heart, Achilles who is such a calm and reassuring presence—

Achilles, who is in distress. she sees the dark shape of a tail, of course she does, but what he looks like is of no concern. the only thing that matters in this moment is that he seems like he's in pain, or at least suffering from something she cannot see. that's what scares her about his change, the trail of feathers, the new and unfamiliar parts of the silhouette hunched before her: that it might be a source of pain for him. ]

Achilles...? It's Mona.

[ she doesn't want to startle him, but she doesn't want him to think she's afraid of him either. she enters the alleyway with slow footsteps, the steady click of her heels dispelling any notions of hesitance while still leaving him enough space to breathe. ]

...Lady Mona?

[ His voice is shaky, but he lifts his head for a moment, still trying desperately to hide what's there. ]

Please... I don't... want to frighten you...

[ Or anyone. But especially not the girls or children. ]

[ if he had said he simply wanted her to stay away from him, Mona would have waited. it isn't her intention to corner him, or to intrude if he truly wants to be alone. that isn't what he asks for, though. instead, in response to that particular plea, she takes a few measured steps closer, deliberate; defiant, in her own subdued way. she shakes her head. ]

I'm not frightened of you. [ true to her word, there's no fear in her expression, not of him. she's only frightened for his sake. ] It doesn't matter what you look like... It's still you, isn't it? Achilles.

[ she stops short of him, perhaps two arms' lengths away, for Achilles' own comfort, and crouches down to put herself on eye level with him. her hands stay on her knees, as though to reassure him that she isn't going to touch him. ]

I'm just worried. It looks like it hurts.

[ When she says all that and comes closer, he finally uncovers his head and turns to look at her, revealing his new (old? returning?) horns. He looks ashamed as he does, quickly averting his eyes again after meeting hers. ]

It... hurts less than it did before... before they came out that is...

[ But still not exactly... pain free. ]

I'm so sorry... I don't have any kind of healing abilities to help you. I know first-aid, but...

[ that isn't going to help much when the cause of his pain is his horns growing from his skull. as she thought, she isn't any use in situations like these. in any situations. the best she can do is just... be there. that isn't always enough. ]

Um! I could get you medicine, or I could bring Medic or Chiron here, or...

N-No, it’s all right. It’s starting to feel a bit... better now. I can ask them to look at it if it still hurts later...

[ He doesn’t want to bother anyone. He doesn’t want to cause trouble. But also, now that someone else is here with him... ]

It... you just being here... helps a lot.

[ He doesn’t want to be left alone. ]

[ with a tentative smile on her face, she crawls on hands and knees to sit beside him, back against the alley wall. her legs are folded up, knees to her chest and hands atop them like a little girl. ]

We'll have to change your clothes again...

[ there's only one reason why his appearance would have changed, so she can guess; there's no need to ask. if he wants to talk about the memories he regained, it's his choice. ]

[ He turns his head and looks over his shoulder, frowning at the bare parts of his back. ]

Ah... I suppose we will...

...Might be a bit of a blessing though. At least now we won’t have to ruin perfectly good shirts by cutting out the back.

But you're going to have to cut holes in all your trousers, now.

[ she can't help teasing a little bit. maybe it'll help him feel like it's less of big deal, too. ]

[ He keeps looking over his shoulder and... as if in response to that comment his tail flicks a few times.

...Okay now he’s laughing a little. ]

Hah... I suppose I will. It’ll feel rather silly but at least it’ll be a bit easier to deal with.

[ He pauses and then: ]

It... truly doesn’t frighten you? At all?

[ she tilts her head to the side, genuinely puzzled by his question. ]

Should it? The way you look has changed a bit, that's all. [ there's a moment where she considers her words, tries to arrange them clearly before she speaks: ] If that's what you're worried about... then whatever you remembered didn't make you any less kind. So why would I be frightened?

[ that's where she means to leave it, but she finds herself adding— ] You aren't a monster.

[ “You aren’t a monster”

There’s something about those words that hits Achilles right in his heart. Like it was something he needed to hear. ]

And... would you still say that if I... if I changed even more? If I had fur and claws and didn’t even resemble anything humanoid anymore...?

[ she takes the time to picture it first, rather than give him a quick response that might be seen as dismissive. a fairytale beast with a great, furred body and enormous jaws, something that looks like it means to devour you whole — a dragon, or a bear, or a huge wolf...

... but one that says Achilles' words, no matter how grating its voice. his gentle gaze, his caring touch, even his absentmindedness. ]

It's still you. [ she announces her conclusion with a firm nod. ] If you have feelings... and your heart is the same as the Achilles I know... then there's no way you could ever be a monster. Not in any way that matters.

[ He’s quiet as those words fully sink in and then he finds his eyes starting to water. He’s not even sure why - why this is something he’s so worried about at all.

Maybe he was just worried about losing family again.

Realizing that he’s tearing up he hastily wipes away at his eyes. ]

Thank you... Mona. I... really needed to hear that, I think.