new year, new you

[cancrymods]

It's been some time since the Executors made their way down to the Gula layer and while things have been quiet, that doesn't necessarily mean they haven't been busy. The snow that had been falling steadily for the past week or so has finally eased, even if a thick blanket of the stuff seems to remain in all the Layers you've travelled to. The ever present threat of an Authority has been mitigated somewhat by Gerda being... well, Gerda and though her intentions and the full scope of her motivations are still a mystery, she at least seems to be willing to assist the Executors so long as they do the same for her in turn.

All the errands they've been running have done a lot to help the Undercity – the kitchen is stocked, and the communal areas feel fuller and livelier. Music often rings out from the stage and all in all, things seem fuller and warmer here.

And yet, that quiet hunger continues to nip at you every moment you spend in Gula. Even if it weren't for the Gluttony Layer's effects, though, there would be answers aplenty to be hungering after – the mysterious butterfly accompanying Ariel, the question of Rei's lack of memories... and of course, the mystery girl who seems determined to see you all returned to mindless Specters once again.

Do you still believe you have what it takes to travel to the bottom of Purgatory and restore things to their natural order?

There's only one way to find out for sure.

[ ... And we're back! After our holiday break, the Gula chapter of Can Cry's metaplot is now continuing! Happy New Year, Executors - let's see what you make of it! ]

Comments

[crypddyd]

If it turns out it was a mistake, in the end, she would be a new Executor- and by experience and numbers it should be no difficulty to... subdue her.

[The glint in his eye says 'remurder' but he's being good for Mona's sake]

The question then is who should approach her about it?

[swordofajerk]

Whoever it is shouldn't be alone. I'll go with them, just in case.

[alcahest]

... I'd like to do it, if that's alright. I want this to resolve peacefully.

[emberserker]

You'd better not get yourself destroyed. But you've been around from the beginning; you should be strong enough should something go wrong.

[You know, "around from the beginning," that thing that doesn't apply to Sword. Two can play this game.]

[alcahest]

... Does being here since the beginning have anything to do with strength...?

[ ???????? no idea what's going on. sorry to undercut your shade at Sword, Wolfsbane. ]

[emberserker]

It means you've trained for eventualities, doesn't it? You haven't just been thrown into this and dragged along while trying to act like you're better. Like me, for example, I was born for this sort of thing.

[alcahest]

... I don't think I have.

[ starting to look mildly distressed. like, wait, is that something i was supposed to be doing this whole time??? ]

[swordofajerk]

Ignore her.

[Seriously, Wolfsbane?]

Anyone else?

[emberserker]

Excuse me. It's bad enough that you've been ignoring my existence for months on end, even when I tried to cooperate with you! I don't care if you weren't trying to usurp me, trying to cut me out entirely is worse!

[swordofajerk]

You haven't done anything of the sort, and right now you're just being petty and upsetting Mona.

[emberserker]

I've been tolerating you since at least Avaritia, and every time I say anything, now you've moved from insults to just acting like I'm not here. If I'm upsetting Mona, it's because I told the truth, not because I'm just being petty.

[swordofajerk]

I never asked you to tolerate me.

[Goddess.]

And what about anything you just said was more than just your opinion? All you said that was since Mona's been around "since the beginning", she should be more than strong enough, as if that has anything to do with it. Even I know Mona doesn't like fighting.

["Even I don't expect her to be strong enough to handle Gerda going feral."]

[mementomoritz]

I'll go! I'd love to observe the results of turning an Authority into an Executor, whatever happens.

Besides, you should probably have a healer on hand in case things go wrong.

[swordofajerk]

...fair enough.

[daughterofthemark]

I believe it would be wise for me to go as well.

[emberserker]

What.

[The resulting stare can only be described as "incredulous disdain."]

What have you been doing all this time? We've been given a rare opportunity by fate itself. Born and died for this, to change the universe and repair the reincarnation cycle to what it's supposed to be. We awoke at the right place and time to be granted the power we were! You can't just waste it by not honing it.

[schardynfreude]

No one is wasting anything.

[emberserker]

[She whirls around to gape at Chiron, as if she didn't expect for a second that he'd say that, even if it were to defend Mona.]

You've been fighting Revenants the same as anyone else. You know how strong we have to be, you know there's no tearing down that demon who locked your memories otherwise!

[alcahest]

[ Mona does actually look chastened by this, and shrinks back a little. Phoenix told her, once, that it was alright not to fight, and so she hadn't pushed herself. is she wasting something, by not trying harder? but... this isn't really something she ever wanted.

she... had a life. she had a life that meant something, before. how sad would it be if all of that was just to put her here?

Chiron is already interrupting to defend her, but as Wolfsbane argues with him, Mona speaks up in a small voice: ]

I don't... want to have died for this.

[mementomoritz]

[Medic shrugs, and gently puts a hand on Mona's shoulder.] I think mostly people die for dying.

[Trust her, she's a doctor.]

We all woke up knowing that something was wrong, that we could try to do something about it. But we didn't have to become Executors when Rei offered- we chose to.

[twibeast]

[ Normally Achilles would shut down completely whenever Wolfsbane gets this aggro, a defense mechanism to cope with what (or rather who) she reminded him of.

But this time... it's as if something finally clicked into place. ]

Is that what you've been telling yourself to make yourself feel better about this?

[emberserker]

[If Wolfsbane was surprised at Chiron speaking up, Achilles saying anything takes her aback for a second or two. The heat inside her boils, and she breathes in and out, shaking.]

If someone fails, then they were weak. I've never been weak. I've trained day and night to be the best. I threw people away when they weren't useful anymore. My own mother tried to replace me, kept saying I wasn't good enough and oh, dear Ernesta should take the family's spot instead, but I kept on for an entire year! I've proven everyone wrong! And now...

[If she's tearing up, she doesn't notice. She sweeps one arm out and knocks over a vase on a table.]

Every single one of us is dead. We all died and awoke and gained this power -- how could any of it not be the will of the gods that people like us are supposed to fix this afterlife? I was on track to gain all the power in the world! Becoming the one and only true mage!

["Now you can become a mage, too!"

No. There can only be one. That was how it worked.]

Don't you... how do you think that isn't...

[mementomoritz]

[Okay, Wolfsbane is being hugged now.]

[No words. Only hugging.]

[swordofajerk]

People die all the time for stupid reasons or no reason at all, weak or strong, and thinking otherwise is just deluding yourself so you feel better.

[Lion is...well, not entirely sane, but undeniably strong. Chiron and Phoenix, too. Sword himself. There's no way Wolfsbane can think they're all weak.]

If you want to think this is some kind of fate, then whatever makes you happy. But personally, the goddess doesn't care enough about us to plan that kind of shit. Whatever this is has nothing to do with her or any other god.

[twibeast]

[ Achilles quietly listens as Wolfsbane goes on. He knows he should feel bad for her, and a small part of him does, but the story she's telling is not one he hasn't heard before.

"Why? Why wouldn't she even look at me!?"

"You're going to replace me with Orthrus! You hate me just like Mother does...!"

With the memories so fresh in his mind, it's hard for him to feel as sympathetic as another might. ]

Ah, yes... I see now. I see you for what you are. I knew someone like this.

[ He rises up to his feet from wherever he'd been laying before. He's not going to approach her, he has to keep his size in mind now when moving in enclosed spaces, but both heads are set on her. ]

Circumstances in your life left you feeling inferior, and so you struggled to prove you weren't, lashing out to feel even a little bit better without a care for how you treated others. I feel for you and yet, I also feel nothing.

[ Maybe some of the others will find him cold for saying that, perhaps even think less of him, but he doesn't care right now. ]

That aside, I can tell you now: as one who has known gods - was birthed by one even - this is hardly their will. I find it very hard to believe the Allmother made me just so I could live for thousands of years and then die to accomplish my true "fate".

However if you truly need a reason for your awakening here, something to give you purpose, then consider perhaps instead that you were given a chance to change. Another opportunity to grow and experience, become better than you were. Because clearly if your heart is so black that you honestly believe weakness is failure and that those who aren't useful to you should be thrown away then you are in dire need of it.

You act as if Mona has been wasting her time here by not honing her fighting abilities. And yet who is it that still, all these layers later, causes unnecessary fights at every single meeting? Who is it that hasn't grown at all?

Your strength means nothing if you haven't learned a single thing.