meet and greet

[cancrymods]

If you've been paying any attention to the screens around Invidia (and it's honestly harder NOT to pay attention to them than it is to actually do so) then you'll be familiar with Esme, the woman whose face graces every single screen. Some initial poking around has revealed that Esme is a sort of idol to the people of Invidia, whose enviously glamourous life has taken the city by storm but that's more or less all you've learned so far.

But it looks like you might have the opportunity to learn more sometime soon.

Just as the dark sky of Invidia gives way to what passes for daytime, all of the screens in Invidia light up with the same video – it's Esme, perched on what looks to be a fancy throne in the middle of a white void, nothing to distract from the glaringly insincere sincere smile on her face as she addresses the camera.

"Good morning, lovelies! ❤ I've been soooooo busy with work and filming lately, I haven't had even a single second to see any of you in person! And what's the point of all that hard work if I don't even get to see your smiling faces at the end of it? So today we're having a very special event! For this afternoon only, I'll be on the Starlight Stage on the roof of our mall, all ready to shake hands and sign things and see all of you lovelies face to face again! Make sure you hurry on down to see me, okay? Bye-bye-bye! ❤"

With a wave and a sickly sweet smile to the camera, Esme signs off.

Looks like you've been given an opportunity to do a little investigating...

Comments

[cancrymods]

[ Esme's quiet for a moment. It's clear she's mulling over her response before she gives it. ]

Are you really telling me you don't know what the Cogs do?

[discutio]

Do I look like I might be someone who would willingly act stupid?

[That was a genuine question--he decidedly did not look like anything of the sort, and Phoenix knew that was the only real proof he had that he wasn't fully sure what in the hell they were doing.]

I know very little of the detailed workings of this realm, and less still of what might happen if and when we accomplish what we have set out to do.

[cancrymods]

The Cogs destroy everything. They chew everything up and spit it out shiny and clean on the other side. You let everything go so you can pass on through and become someone else in your next life, without worrying about what you got up to in your last one.

Why the hell would I ever want to do something like that?

[discutio]

[...the fuck]

Two questions.

How do you know this, and are you certain that's the case?

[cancrymods]

Because that's how things work here. You peel away all the parts of yourself that are too ugly or twisted up to make it through and then when you're pretty and perfect enough, you get to move on.

Reincarnation. That's what we're supposed to be here for.

[discutio]

...hm.

[He paused to consider that for a moment, gloved hand raised to his face. True, 'reincarnation' had been the end goal, but he hadn't given any real thought to the meaning behind that.]

What you're saying...that process doesn't quite add up. In fact, it's seemed the opposite for most of us. We awoke with no memory of who we were, and began gaining back as much rather than losing it. Is such a thing normal in leading up to reincarnation, or is that a side effect of the Cogs not working at the moment?

[cancrymods]

[ She shrugs. ]

Who knows. Maybe? It makes about as much sense as anything else in Purgatory.

[ Which is to say: not a whole lot, but we're rolling with it anyway. ]

It's different for us, though. Eidolons. I know that much, at least. Once we start remembering, it's easier to keep remembering, because we know we're missing something. Specters just end up rotting away.

[discutio]

...

[Another pause--at least he was listening rather than dismissing the idea out of hand.]

It's true that we've been operating on vague direction that I feel none of us truly understand. Perhaps that's been careless of us; as of the moment I don't know if preventing reincarnation entirely is a wise choice given that too could have unknown consequences, but it may be worth treading far more carefully in our actions.

I don't want to disappear myself, not before I at least understand who I was.

[emberserker]

But the alternative is ending up a Revenant when the place has worn at you too badly, isn't it?

[discutio]

Some might think it better to live and die...well, 'die' as they choose, rather than be erased entirely. Is it wrong to fault them for that?

[schardynfreude]

So you'd let all these souls, all the specters, in this city and in others, just wither away and cease to be.

[cancrymods]

That's a little dramatic, don't you think? It's not like they disappear even if they do end up turning into Revenants.

[schardynfreude]

But they will, eventually, all become those near mindless creatures. And then where will you be? No one left to cheer for you.

[alcahest]

... That's what I thought.

[ Mona's soft, quiet voice is a change from the tense back-and-forth thus far. ] You're scared... because you don't want to disappear.

[cancrymods]

[ She looks a little caught off guard at that and her response is a little cautious. ]

That's right.

... Nobody would.

[mementomoritz]

Statistically, the average person does tend to have death as their number one fear- followed by public speaking.

[Medic's happy fun time fact hour: for kids!]

I guess returning to life is a lot like dying again, if you think about it.

[twibeast]

...Existing forever is not much better though.

If you never die, if you never move on, if you always exist in some form, the same form... you cease to care and see less and less meaning in things...

You become cold and hollow...

[ He's mostly talking to himself right now. but huh, kinda weird and specific there Beast. ]

[cancrymods]

We're not returning anywhere, though. We just get kicked out into a whole new life with no control over any of it. I'm not giving up all this just to risk that.

[schardynfreude]

But you aren't happy like this.

[cancrymods]

What makes you think that?

[schardynfreude]

[It's not necessarily intended to be a mocking tone, but he does put on a slightly uhh higher and more feminine tone that's supposed to sound vaguely like Esme!]

Do you have any idea what it's like having to be nice to people all the time?

Goodness, that must be terribly boring. And exhausting. Pretending so hard to be what your adoring fans want you to be.

[alcahest]

[ it's something they've never really talked about as a group — reincarnation, the end goal of what they're doing here. Mona has never thought about it. until just recently, it wouldn't have bothered her at all, and she would have been perfectly content to carry on without so much as a thought towards it, but... ]

... Mh. You'll... lose everything about who you are, right...?

[cancrymods]

Of course. It's not like I can take any of it with me. It'll get ground down into nothing and then what'll be left? Not me, that's for sure.

[alcahest]

... I understand.

[ what else can she possibly say to that? Esme is right. she'll disappear. if that's the way Purgatory is supposed to work, then there's no other way either. there are no solutions nor any comfort that Mona can offer. she doesn't even know how she herself feels about it yet, having only just really considered it for the first time. ]

But, Esme... Aren't you lonely here?

[daughterofthemark]

To lose what makes you yourself...