[Open] Dr. Medic's Sleepaway Funtimes Camp

[mementomoritz]

I. So girl keep telling me [network post]

[About three hours after the whole post-Esmeeting kerfuffle, every phone included in the Executor group chat suddenly blares loudly with an incoming post that appears to have every possible alert and priority notice the person writing it could find attached to it.]

ANYONE WHO ATE ANYTHING AT ESME'S HOUSE REPORT TO MEDIC IMMEDIATELY YOU ARE POISONED


[Well, you can't accuse her of burying the lede.]

i'm in my lab in invidia [The exact address and coordinates of the lab are attached along with the message, including a helpful photo of a scribbled map just in case anyone is really bad with directions.] if you ate ANY of the food esme served or if you're feeling sick, come here so i can treat you
if you find someone unconscious or unable to move on their own, BRING THEM HERE
if you don't have anyone around and think you need help getting here, reply to this message immediately

i threw up, so i tested some of the leftovers i took home
and that food is very, very poisoned
(also, if you brought leftovers home, don't eat them)


II. pick me up whenever i'm feeling down [in-person log]

[True to her word, Medic is ready and waiting in her lab the second anyone arrives.]

[The living room of the apartment she commandeered has been turned into a makeshift hospital. She's dragged cushions and mattresses in, laying them out on the floor and covering them with clean sheets and blankets to make sickbeds. Next to every bed is a glass of water and a bowl for, uh. Any stomach issues you might have to deal with.]

[Anyone healthy who walks in the door will be cheerfully pressganged into nursing duty.]

[The beds are set up facing the living room's lone TV, but well... this is Invidia. Guess who's probably on every channel.]

[You might have better luck with putting on a movie, but no one actually saw this coming, which means your available selection consists exclusively of stuff Medic brought with her from the Limbo library when she came down to Invidia. By which we mean exactly one film.]

[Whether having to see Esme's face is better or worse than watching Brutal Instinct again is a choice you're going to have to make amongst yourselves.]

Comments

[twibeast]

[ Hooooo boy here we go. ]

About that...

[ He makes a show of looking around carefully, before leaning in closer to her and lowering his voice. ]

Is it not strange to you that Lady Kotori was in the lead for so long but somehow at the last second lost to Miss Esme?

[ And then his voice gets even lower, to almost a whisper. ]

The truth is my lady, your beauty was not my only reason for approaching you today - though you are beautiful, make no mistake about it. In actuality I am a private investigator, tasked with trying to uncover if there was any foul play during the competition.

[ I mean, it may not be entirely true but it’s also not a LIE technically........ ]

For you see, Lady Kotori did not simply lose: she died, abruptly and in a most awful manner. Esme’s win was only by default.

My colleagues and I... fear the worst for Lady Alice as well, because of this.

[cancrymods]

Even saying that the Spectre's expression lights up is a comical understatement. She practically explodes with sparkles, her expression growing brighter and brighter the more he continues to talk. Worried? About Alice? Concerned that Invidia's biggest star might be in dire need of cancelling? Why, of course not. The pretty guy who's being nice to her is a cool detective investigating a murder! It's just like her otomes.

"Then, then, then–!" She's so excited and worked up that she's furiously shaking her fists again. "If I gave you information, would you be able to find her?!"

[twibeast]

[ Oh Goddess that sure is a reaction. But! This is good! ]

I cannot give you a guarantee that I will but anything you can give me would be a huge help.

[ And then he smiles, as softly and charmingly as he can. ]

Won't you please help me... my lady?

[cancrymods]

"OF COURSE I WILL!"

It's lucky that this is all taking place in Invidia, where this sort of weirdness goes... mostly unnoticed because she's so worked up at the sheer everything of this situation that she practically explodes. She can't even keep still, she's so excited.

"What do you need to know?! Ask me anything and I'll tell you!"

[twibeast]

[ Oh god, rip his eardrums. ]

W-Well, for starters do you have any idea where she might be, or where I should look to find out more?

I really do fear that I wasn’t able to catch most of the contest when it was still airing - detective work and all that keeps one quite busy. There are likely many things you as a big fan should be able to tell me.

[cancrymods]

"Well, um..."

Oh, now she's been put on the spot it looks like she's floundering a little bit. It's like being put on the spot to tell a joke and having your entire sense of humor evaporate on the spot.

"Wait! She always said she missed the place she used to work before she became an idol... if she retired then maybe she just decided to go back and work there?"

[twibeast]

Oh! Really?

You wouldn’t also happen to know what place this was, would you?

[ Ignoring that Claire already revealed the cursed location in another thread ]

[cancrymods]

"Of course! What kind of fan would I be if I didn't?"

Good news! You get to hear it all over again!

"It's "BBQ and Foot Massage-While-U-Wait"!"

[twibeast]

[ .............. ]

Pardon?

[cancrymods]

"BBQ and Foot Massage-While-U-Wait!"

She says it in the exact same breezy, cheery tone as if she hasn't just said something deeply, intensely cursed.

[twibeast]

I... I see.

[ Okay. Just. Recollect yourself. ]

I... shall be sure to head there post haste to see what I can find.

You have been most helpful, my lady. You have my thanks.

[cancrymods]

"Do you know where it is?" She doesn't even give him a chance to respond before she hurries on, all in an excited rush. "I'll come too, so I can show you the way! It's important for you to get to the right place, isn't it?"

And also, it's absolutely transparent she doesn't want to miss out on any more of this murder mystery nonsense.

[twibeast]

Ah-

[ Uh oh ]

Are... Are you sure, my lady? I hate to take up more of your time or get you too involved...

[cancrymods]

"Of course I'm sure! This is really important! And if you're investigating something serious like a murder then you need someone who really knows all about Alice to help you out!"

Her eyes are dead serious. You're not going anywhere without her, buster.

[twibeast]

[ Well. No fighting it now it seems. ]

Well... all right. But please be sure to use discretion, my lady. This is dangerous work and I cannot risk being found out or getting you in danger.

[ In other words: PLEASE be quieter he is begging ]

Lead the way then.

[cancrymods]

She gasps excitedly and covers her mouth before asking, in a stage whisper: "Are we undercover?"

I'm so sorry THIS is the Spectre you got stuck with.

[twibeast]

[ Internally: ]

[twibeast]

[ Externally: ]

Y-Yes, my lady.

You seemed like someone I could [ “trick easily and get information from” ] trust, so I made an exception in telling you.

[cancrymods]

Still sparkling with delight, the Spectre gives him an "okay!", still in a stagewhisper and then starts hurrying her way to the front of the store. It... looks like she's trying to be stealthy about it but of course, she's just drawing more attention to herself like this.

"Come on, this way!"

[twibeast]

[ He allows himself one deep, beleaguered sigh before following after her.

Here’s hoping he doesn’t have to explain this to the other two if they run into him. (That’s exactly what’s gonna happen Beast, rip in fuck.) ]

[schardynfreude]

[Hey speaking of running into the other two!

Chiron spots Beast--dear gods, it's hard not to spot Beast--coming from the opposite end of the block, and he raises a hand in greeting. So Beast got the same information as well!

...................Surely that girl trying to be flamboyantly and obnoxiously sneaky isn't with him like obviously of course not don't be silly]

[twibeast]

[ Aw fuck. Just his luck.

He raises his hand as well, but judging by that incredibly awkward and almost apologetic look on his face, there’s SOMETHING up.

He just hoping fangirl specter doesn’t notice that ANOTHER GOOD LOOKING DUDE just waved to “Hot Guy PI” and puts two and two together. ]

[cancrymods]

It's vitally important to me that you know that fangirl Spectre has been furiously improvising her own spy theme music under her breath the entire way here, just in case she wasn't conspicuous enough.

Once Chiron waves though, she immediately zooms back over to Beast and leans in so she can stage whisper to him again.

"Is he undercover too?"

... She says this as if Chiron is not right the fuck there.

[discutio]

[The plan was to perhaps get something for lunch and wait for the others to report in; he'd hopefully accomplished something on his side, if it wasn't quite the tangible result he'd wanted.]

[...But then he'd heard someone humming what sounded strangely like suspenseful theme music.]

[As it happened, all roads lead to Insomnia, so ultimately he was going to follow it whether or not he intended to. Hot Guy #3 is within range.]

[schardynfreude]

No one is undercover.

[He gives her a cocked eyebrow because, yes, hello, he's here. And looks at Beast. And looks at her.

Maybe they're undercover, but even if they were, you wouldn't blow your cover by saying you're undercover. That's just undercover 101.

oh look there's phoenix]

I believe we could all use a bite at this so heavily advertised establishment, hm?