cancry | [limbo] // do you walk in the valley of kings

[To cast out the Usurper and usher in dawn's light will cost the life of the Chosen. The voice that had shaken him down to the very core of his existence still echoed in Phoenix's head, words utter nonsense to him now and yet...something about them hurt more than he could measure. Hurt like the gravest news about a dearest friend, hurt like something tearing at his heart and soul. Though the details were lost in a haze of a previous life's memories, he understood the bottom line. One life, the one dearest to the man Phoenix once was, would have to be sacrificed to protect all else-]

[Don't try to justify this! She didn't need to die!]

[Hurt like the agonized rage in that snarl, thundering fury to match the torrential rain around them. The fury of someone who had lost everything, someone--someone whose name he should have known, whose loss he understood and yet couldn't remember the source of. That woman--no, his sister, something terrible had become of her and nearly become of someone just as close to Phoenix's own heart. Everything came in flashes; a man in white and a sword flashing with lightning, faces he failed to recognize and one he knew already. The man in black that had posed briefly as another was a danger above all others, and somehow in the chaos of memory Phoenix understood his past self had known that. 'Oh, what good is a world that only ever lets you down', said the mocking tone, a knife toyed with idly above the unconscious form of...of someone. Someone that meant everything, someone that Phoenix would gladly die to protect.]

[...Maybe he would, the relic of untold power in his hand before he had fully consider what he was doing. It didn't matter. it didn't matter at all what happened to him, because he had sworn-]

[Whatever it takes...I will protect him-!]

[In a memory of rain-soaked stone, the world erupted in flames and agony before going dark forever.]

[In a kitchen in Limbo, there was a clattering of whatever Phoenix had been holding falling to the floor before he very swiftly followed it.]

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I...no. It's nothing.

[He'd need to figure out what to think about any of this first. Knowing Chiron wasn't in the same layer was almost comforting at the moment.]

I'm sorry if I startled you.

[She sighs and walks around him to rummage in the cupboards.]

He mentioned that you weren't getting along. Or rather, that he found your disposition sour enough to tell you so, as he does.

[Was that really what he'd thought? Sure, Phoenix had taken his insistence to help as condescending--it had struck a nerve he didn't fully understand, like some memory of a life long since lost to him. But he didn't dislike Chiron for it, no matter how frustrating he could find their interactions.]

[...Could he still say that now, knowing even what little he did?]

I suppose we must have different perspectives on our cooperation..

Apparently. [She shuts a cupboard drawer and sighs.] He also thinks I'm difficult to get along with. I just have a goal in mind, that's all.

[As she says that, though, her voice wavers for a bit.]

Ugh. The memories must be wearing at the lot of us.

...Did you remember something?

[His voice was almost forcibly steady, Phoenix straightening up once he'd gathered all that had been knocked over.]

It's nothing important.

[Her voice tightens. Still, she stops.]

Or rather... do you believe we're all friends, like Medic does? That if someone stopped being useful in one way, we'd still keep them around, because there wouldn't be any reason not to?

You've kept me around.

[...That registered as a strange kneejerk response to Phoenix. Why was that a concern that felt like something to worry about?]

What? You haven't lost your Executor powers. Or anything else, for that matter, that you had when we met you. As annoying as it was to hear that man prattling about your friendship skills or your backside, you've done nothing but help. I don't know where you're getting this idea.

[...waitwhat]

[you know, never mind that for now]

I can't find my way around this new layer, Wolfsbane. When it comes down to it, I may not be worth anything in combat. Is it then justified for you and the others to leave me behind, regardless of my will to fight?

...[She takes in and lets out a slow breath.] That's what I want to know. Not about you. But if I did that, I had no reason to, did I? Of course I felt as if I had to, or...

[Or what?]

Or that that was simply the way of things. But it's ridiculous, even so. We won't leave you or Lion or whoever else may be having issues. Avaritia is ridiculous; why blame you for it?

Even if you would want to leave us behind, it would be our choice to either remain behind or to follow into a situation heavily disadvantageous towards us. Even should the latter result in our deaths such as they are here.

Does it bother you, then, to realize most if not all of us would refuse to shed potential liability?

I'd rather not be told what to do or that I'm doing something wrong, of course. And with Rosa, I'm sure I must have had my reasons.

[But thinking of her pleading in the rain to be let back in the gate... She scoffs, trying to shake it out of mind.]

I simply want to know what it is that brought things to the point that they were. Not just with that. With that Ernesta, too. Surely there's nothing to worry about.

...Do you not think it a simple matter of attachment? Wolfsbane, this group is essentially all that any of us truly knows, save for flickers and shreds of memory. Of course we would wish to coexist as we can both in and out of battle, else we would be alone in a realm we know nothing of.

[She sighs and opens the pantry.]

Of course. Well, think nothing of it. We'll just power through the next layer and the rest after that. That's the goal that's been in front of us from the start.

What is it that's bothering you? Are you worried about being left behind, because I can think of no reason any of us would.

Of course not, I --

[She knocks something off the counter, a pepper shaker that hits the floor and rolls.]

...Perhaps I felt I would be, if I didn't do it first. I know I was in a tournament where there could only be one winner. And once an ally lost their ability to participate, I felt there was no reason to keep them. I don't know why.

...Perhaps the person you were believed it to be the pragmatic solution, given the victory condition.

I've noticed you say "the person you were." Others do too. Is it because we won't be those people anymore when we're born over again?

I don't know if there's any one answer for that. Perhaps we will, or perhaps not. For the moment, however, I would like to think that whether or not the people we were are who we become by the time we reach the end of this is up to each of us in turn.

You mean, whether we choose to let go, even of the things we've gotten back.

Ideally, yes.

It's a happier future for sure. It might be more realistic to foresee the oblivion Esme projected, not that I'd like to give that snake credit for a thing in her unlife. But we still don't know.

Prepare for the worst, but hope for the best? I would think that a sound course of action.

Naturally. Which, right now, means making sure nobody gets dragged down. Are you quite well now?

...I think there are a few things I'll need to sort out first. But I will manage.

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